I admit it. I'm going through a change-of-life. . . . .again! And it is a woman thing.
Clearly I got home from Florida. I did take my trip to the Keys. It was just as I imagined it. I loved driving the Overseas Highway that connects the Keys. And I loved the 5 hours I spent in Key West. It was charming, and lively, and funky, and bigger than I had imagined.
So technically I started my drive home in Key West. It is a long haul from Key West to Afton, Virginia. It took the better part of 4 days with miscellaneous stops along the way.
But I had a reason to get home. And her name is Rudy.
Before leaving for Florida, I had decided that I was going to adopt a dog when I got back. Yes, I considered all the ways that a dog would hamper my current lifestyle. And God knows I was reminded of that by every well-meaning person who heard of my plans.
But the bottom line was two-fold. The hours I was spending ALONE were being used up often by sitting in the house trying not to eat. I was either working out, or staying in and trying not to eat. I felt that it had been all about me all the time for long enough. And besides. . there are doggies out there who need homes.
Enter Kevin, my handyman who built a fence around approximately 50% of the acre of land I own. The fence was finished and in place by the time I left for Florida. I had perused the local shelter sites, and had already found a couple of dogs that looked promising. I had a long list of requirements:
1. This dog had to be small. I needed to be able to take the dog with me to Chautauqua and to Sarasota. Which led to:
2. This dog cannot be a barker!!! Condos do not love dogs that bark. My rentals for my time in New York and Florida are expensive and I can't risk being thrown out with a barking dog! No refunds!!
3. This dog must not be "nose-driven." My last dog, Chester, was a love. But he was a hound. And if he smelled something then woe unto the person who was trying to get his attention. And because of that nose he was always trying to get away. . . to find whatever it was that he was smelling. No more!!!
4. This dog must be sweet. As in. . . doesn't need to beat up every other dog he/she sees. Again . . . . Chester. . . . and Clyde before him. . . .. couldn't be around other dogs. Did NOT play nice with others. Thugs through and through! Never again!
5. This dog must be housebroken. Self-explanatory. I have a brand new house.
6. This dog must learn quickly. I have a lot to teach it.
7. This dog must be cute and lovable. I know, I know. Don't judge a book by its cover. I'm sorry. . .this time I need a great cover!
So before I left for Florida I found "Zena" at a web-site for the Lynchburg, Va. animal shelter. And she looked perfect! Once I got to Florida, I checked the site and she was still available. So I wrote to them.
Got the typical response: You sound perfect but WE CAN'T SAVE DOGS FOR PEOPLE!!!
Enter my extraordinary friend Sandy. Never has there been a more ardent animal lover than Sandy. When I was told that "Zena" would be at an adoption event in Lynchburg, Sandy piled her only moderately "on board" husband, Bill into the car and headed for the event. Acting as my agent, they vetted "Zena", found her worthy, and immediately signed up to be her foster parents. They brought her home. Ten days before I was supposed to get home. Now that's a friend!
So Sandy and Bill had "Zena." The first thing I did was to email them and tell them that her name was now "Rudy." I don't know why. She was just always Rudy, from the moment I saw her online!
I got daily reports as Sandy and Bill fell in love with this little girl. And when I arrived home on a Wednesday, I unpacked the car and headed for their house to meet her. She was perfect! But she was also completely settled at their house. We decided that Sandy would bring her to me the very next day.
And so she arrived one week ago today. And she was not at all sure that she wanted to stay. My house was smaller. She didn't know me. That night I had the biggest case of "buyer's remorse" that anyone could have. What had I done? Here was this ANIMAL in my cute little house, and she didn't even like me! She kept looking at the door hoping Sandy would return. There goes my freedom! YIKES!!
But 24 hours later all was well. And in the last 7 days I have gone through Meno-paws!!! My life is wonderful. Yes. . I have to get up early to let her out before I work out. I have a crate where she sleeps at night and when I'm gone. I have to pay attention each and every day to my plans so that they provide her with as little time in that crate as possible.
But my life is already so much better! Yes. . . my house is a wreck! I'm not even unpacked completely yet! But the other day she and I went out in the car for several hours to run errands, and it wasn't until I got home that I realized that I had not taken my phone with me! I hadn't realized that up until Rudy arrived, my IPhone had become my pet!
I sit less. We are out in the yard more. Rudy's best friend, besides me (and Sandy), is the big black rooster next door named Duke. They run back and forth on their respective side of the fence. If Rudy runs off to find a stick to chew, Duke stands at the fence crowing to get her back. It's hilarious!
We have spent the last few evenings watching Jane Austen movies. After raising 2 boys and having only boy dogs. . . it's nice to do girl things for a change!
So stay tuned for more Rudy news. It's good to be connected. To have something that needs me. To have a living body in the house who thinks I hung the moon! It's nice to have a baby again!
So here's to change-of-life! Stay tuned!
Well, it takes all kinds, and Sarasota is no exception. This story is about clapping, praying, and a manatee. And it all happened yesterday.
So I went swimming at the Y. And I picked a new time to go. I've been experimenting with when is the best time to get my own lane at the pool. It's not that I mind sharing. But after you've swum your mile in a lane all to yourself, it's hard to confine yourself to just a half lane. Since I swim every other length back stroke, I find that I have mangled my hands and arms while hitting the lane dividers if I have to stay on one side because someone else is sharing my lane. I don't begrudge sharing. .. I begrudge hurting myself. And if I'm getting tired, it becomes annoying. And I get bitchy. And I begin grousing. Which is stupid, because I'm grousing about sharing a lane at the Y as opposed to grousing about, oh let's say cancer!!! Perspective is a beautiful thing.
So yesterday I arrived around 10, and I have to say of all the time frames I have tested out, this one was the worst. I was sharing a lane from the get-go. And I ended up sharing with another serious swimmer (like me!!! :) ) and we were both intent on getting in all our laps. Now that I'm swimming with goggles, face in the water, I can see what is going on around me. Now I'm not proud of this next part. . . truly. But out of the corner of my eye I see swimming in the next lane what looks like a manatee! I was not expecting that. But here was a large, slow moving body that consisted mostly of 4 limbs hanging down in the water. Well, of course it was a rather large, rather old man. And he was barely moving. And he had a lane of his own. And here's the part I'm really not proud of. I got pissy! Not out-loud. . . more like internal pissy. I'm swimming back and forth in my shared lane, banging my hands against the lane dividers the whole time, and begrudging this manatee for having his own lane. I mean seriously. . . . . . And after lapping this human manatee about 4 times, and banging my hands over and over, I did an underwater reality and attitude check. I'm swimming and banging my hands and cursing, but also having a serious talk with myself about my selfish attitude. And I slowed down a bit, and got my emotions under control, and, shocker, stopped banging my hands so much, and made peace with this giant of an old man who deserved all the credit in the world for getting into his suit and coming out to the Y to do what exercise he could. And I started sending good thoughts to him every time I passed him. And then I started mentally rooting for him as I swam back and forth. "Go Manatee man! Keep going! You have endurance! You'll be doing a mile before you know it." And I kept on swimming and didn't feel angry anymore. In fact, I was starting to LOVE Manatee Man! Which felt a whole lot better than being pissy. And then I noticed there were two people in the manatee lane! Someone had joined Manatee Man in his lane. And I couldn't help thinking, "Get out of that lane. Let Manatee Man have his own lane! Give this man a break!" And then I just had to start laughing at myself. Talk about mood swings! And of course if you laugh under water you just choke, which I did. I really feel bad about my initial reaction to Manatee Man. I wish him the best, I really do.
Today was my last day to swim because I leave for the Keys in the morning. And as karma would have it, I had a lane all to myself. Well, karma and the fact that I had the sense to show up at 2:00 in the afternoon which I have learned is the dead time in the pool. I was a little verklempt leaving the Y. I transformed into a swimmer in less than a month. I swam a mile every day for the last 12 days. I'm leaving the Y a different person!
So Manatee Man. . . character #1.
Then there was the incident after I got out of the pool yesterday. I went through my routine of taking a shower and washing my hair and getting dressed. This is followed by drying my hair with one of the two hair dryers provided in the locker room. My hair now takes no more than 30 seconds to dry. Which is great. So as I approached the room where the hair dryers were, I noticed that hair dryer to the left was being used by a woman with thick longish hair. She was full on into the middle of what looked like an elaborate hair styling project. This would take awhile. So I focused on the hair dryer to the right. Now this one was not actually being used. But there was a woman standing by it with all her clothes on the counter. The hair dryer was off it's stand and was stretched across the woman's clothes. Like she was getting ready to use it. But she wasn't using it. In fact, she wasn't even facing it. She was turned and was speaking with another woman. She had a hold of the woman's hands and was speaking very intently to her. I waited there a minute thinking she would notice me and see that I was waiting for the hair dryer. But no. As a matter of fact, she then began to pray rather loudly with this woman. And by praying WITH the woman, I really mean praying AT the woman. There was only one woman praying. And it was the woman who was holding the hair dryer hostage. So now I'm waiting patiently for the prayer to end and wondering what the Y protocol is for asking someone who is praying out loud if you can please use the hair dryer because it will only take about 30 seconds. And this prayer is clearly going to take longer! Do I take the hair dryer without asking the praying woman? Why are these women praying in the locker room of the Y???? The prayer goes on and I stand there and wait. And then the prayer is finally over, but the ministry goes on. And no one seems to notice that there's someone waiting for a hairdryer. Oh wait. . . I'm wrong. Someone notices. It's lady to the left, still intently working on her hair. She sees my predicament, makes a quick assessment of the fact that I have hardly any hair at all, and offers to stop and let me "cut in." This is beyond nice. I'm tempted to ask her to join me in a prayer of thanks. But instead I thank her and grab the hair dryer, do my thing for 30 seconds, and give it back to her. By now praying lady has figured out what is going on and is apologizing for hogging the hair dryer through her religious experience. I'm afraid she is going to ask me to join with her in prayer to beg for forgiveness. So I just smile, say "No problem" and I'm on my way.
Praying Hair Dryer Woman - Character #2
In the afternoon, Sue and I went to the circus! We filed into the Big Top, which was a one-ring job. We found our seats in the padded bleachers. We were in a circus kind of mood after our sojourn to town to see Wallenda walk the wire above the city the day before. I was in an ebullient mood. Which is pretty normal for me. I was determined to get pink cotton candy at the intermission. Hang the fact that it's sugar! Hang the fact that it's artificially colored! Hang the fact that it was probably made 2 months ago and had been sitting there with its blue brother ever since! I was at the circus! And I was going to eat cotton candy during the second half. Sue made it clear that she was not!
So we wait about 20 minutes and then out comes the Ringmaster, and the show has begun. The first act is horses. And I get right into the rhythm of the thing by remembering that at the circus, you are clapping almost constantly. Because amazing things keep happening. So when the very first guy jumps up on the very first horse and rides on his rump (the horse's) around the circle and then does a back flip and lands back on the rump (again, the horse's). . . . well, I do what everyone else does, I clap wildly.
Immediately an old man who is sitting in front of me with his wife turns around and gives me a look that tells me he wishes me dead. Seriously. It was terrifying. And he looks right at me with the biggest scowl and says: "You're clapping right in my ear!!!" Before I can say a word, he steps in front of his wife and says, "I'm moving over because (he turns to me with that look again) SHE'S CLAPPING RIGHT IN MY EAR!!!" The only thing I can think of to say is, "I'm sorry. That's where my hands are!" He GLARES at me again and says to his wife, "We're moving over to the next section!" And as if to make sure I understand the reason, he looks at me a final time and says, "You're clapping right in my ear!!!!" And they moved. I looked at Sue and said, "Apparently I was clapping right in his ear!" The little devil that sits on my right shoulder was whispering to me, "You should go over and sit behind them!" But the little angel on my left shoulder said. . . . . well she didn't actually say anything because she was laughing her ass off!
Shouting Ear Clapping Man - Character #3
For the record, I did have cotton candy during the second half. And I continued to clap like crazy many times during each and every act. Which was much easier since I didn't have anyone sitting in front of me!!
