Sunday, May 6, 2012

REFLECTIONS ON A BIRTHDAY


I apologize to any regular readers who believe that I have not been writing because of my continuing grief issues.  While I was being completely transparent when I wrote my grief entry, and indeed felt everything I described, the feelings about leaving choir have ebbed over time, much quicker than if my loss had been a loved one in my life.

In a nutshell the Brahms concert was truly phenominal, and I decided after it was over that it would indeed be my “swan song” for the Kennedy Center.  You just could not ask for a more fitting or powerful ending to an era in your life.

Since then I have spent much more time thinking about all the new things I will be able to do once my schedule is freed up, than spending time in being sad about what will be missing in my life next year.  The final nail in the coffin of the decision was that Dave has sold his house. . . in  only two weeks.  And there are 2 contracts on it.  What a blessing for him, and what a blessing for me that I have been able to use that house to facilitate my being able to sing with Choral Arts for the last 4 years.

So choir-wise I’m moving on.  Can’t wait to see all the things I will do and the places I will go without that weekly obligation to block my availability.  And the memories I will take with me of all the musical mountaintops I experienced will be my comfort.

So I turned 63 yesterday.   It is odd, isn’t it, that from the time we are children and we have a birthday, people come up to us on that day and say,  “How does it feel to be a year older?”  And in truth we aren’t!  We are only a day older.  So it just doesn’t seem that different. .  .unless you are finally qualifying for a legitimate ID, or a driver’s license, or the senior discount.  But we do a number on ourselves with the whole number thing.  I think back to when I started blogging. . . . on my month- long 60th birthday trip.   I still love going back and reading every day of that trip.  But for the record, I feel so much younger today than I did then.  For me 63 feels better.

Of course I’m working at it.  And that’s the point.  As you get older, you have to work harder to feel better.  But boy is it worth it.

Working out nearly every day is a little like being on a sliding board.  Only instead of giving in and sliding to the bottom, you have decided to turn around, grab those tiny rims that are the sides, and struggle back to the top.  It’s so much easier to slide down!   But the best view is from the top of the slide, and it’s worth the effort to get up there to see it. 

I guess you can give in to aging, or fight it.  I’ve never really been a fighter I don’t think.  But in this regard I’ve decided to challenge this aging thing.   With George the Trainer and my juicer by my side, I’m giving this phase of my life a run for it’s money!

Today I’ll venture in to Charlottesville.  I am going to the Paramount Theater to see a screening of the movie Mama Mia.  I’ve seen it several times.  I own the DVD.  But ever since I saw Dr. Zhivago at the Paramount a month or so ago, I have enjoyed the idea of being in that venue watching a great movie.  The jury is still out on whether or not Mama Mia is a great movie.  But I love the music and the gorgeous Greek scenery.  So I'll just have to bite the sides of my mouth when Pierce Brosnan begins to sing (if that's what you want to call it) and soldier through to the end.

Afterwards I will go to Whole Foods to replenish the organic vegetables I need to continue juicing once a day.   I love the idea of all those micro nutrients surging through my body, fighting off the bad guys in my system, making my skin glow, my nails strong, my energy high.   Nature has given us all the drugs we need, and I’m going to avail myself of them.  And, as a bonus, who knew that a glass full of beets, celery, kale, broccoli, romaine lettuce, spinach, parsley, carrots, apple, and lemon could be delicious!  Really!   I would never lie about something like that.

How does it feel to be a year older?   Fabulous!

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